Dunder Mifflin, this is Pam.

Well, here I sit. I'm doing temp work today and I have...umm...another four hours with very little actual work to do. My job today is to answer phones for two executives. However, neither of these executives are in the office, so I'm taking messages. Ah, how my temp agency challenges me. This is much better than my last assignment, which had the glamourous title, "mic runner." What is a mic runner, you ask? Well, mic runners work at conferences; real estate conferences, medical conferences, and so on and so forth. Conferences are typically held in large rooms, so when someone has a question, their voice usually needs to be amplified. Enter the mic runner. I see a hand pop up, I run (literally run) to the person and stick the microphone in their face. Very thrilling. I spent five days standing at the back of a room waiting for someone to raise their hand. Naturally, the people with questions would sit near the front, so when their hand would pop up, the speaker would see it first and begin to yell, "Mic runner! Where are my mic runners?!" I was tempted to run all the way to front and take the speaker down with a flying jumpkick, but typically I stopped short and handed over the microphone. Aaaaanyway, here we are. Good times.

What else is new. I've been in Austin for...three months now. It's been nice. I have a good little group of friends, and I'm meeting lots of great people. I will admit, I think about New York from time to time. I'm currently in the running for a couple of jobs. One is here in Austin, and one is back in New York. I know, I'm an indecisive retard. I sent my resume to my old boss in NYC, who is working at a different PR agency now. So, there's a slim chance I may be heading back. It all depends on what happens in the next month or so. I'm perched pretty solidly on the fence, and my mood changes on a daily basis. One day I'm moving my Metrocard back to the front of my wallet and browsing craigslist for apartments, the next day I'm...well...hanging out in my apartment and driving my car...and living my life in Austin.

Let's see...not much going on girlfriend-wise. Gone are the good ol' days of First Girl, Hoboken Girl and New Girl. I still e-mail back and forth with Hoboken Girl. You'll recall she outlasted the other two. She's now...uh...Long Island Girl? She went back to school to become a gym teacher. I know. Strange. How can you go from working at the most glamourous building in all of New York (Rockefeller Center) to yelling at a bunch of fat teenagers about their inability to touch their toes? Different strokes, I guess. New Girl is out of the picture for good too. She hooked up with one of my best friends. Now, I know she and I aren't anything. And I know I don't live in New York anymore. But still. That's not right. Blah. Whatever.

Wow. How about these adventures and inappropriate stories, huh?! Let's see. I have to add something. I recently went to a bachelor party and met a nice young lady. She hung out with us all night, we got along really well, she came back to my apartment...and then she lost her mind. First she told me about how she stripped her way through college. Alright. Then she talked about her six year old. Umm, okay. Then she began to grill me about why I didn't have a girlfriend. She just couldn't believe that I wasn't cheating on somebody by being with her. Then she showed me her boobs and they looked like fried eggs. Moving on. This past weekend I met a girl at a bar, we got along well, etc, etc...then she told me about her recent engagement. Wonderful. Then she began. To grill me. About why I didn't have a girlfriend. Jesus Christ. Do I have a guilty look on my face or something? Why do I need a girlfriend?! She also told me I looked like Ryan Reynolds which reinforced just how drunk she was. I asked, "are you sure you're thinking of the right person? Don't you mean to say I look like Gary Busey?" No. She was sure. Then I asked, "are you sure you don't mean "Ryan Reynolds from the early scenes of "Just Friends?" No. Not that either. Anyway, this isn't at all relevant, I just wanted to write it down for the record. And I have witnesses.